They use to say a lot

I am a thinker, they say, and I can think better than you, just because I believe it and have 2-3 more people that do so.

I am an “activist”, they say, and the company I am promoting their “activism” pays me well for it.

I am a communist, they say, and I have a good position and a highly paid remuneration, living and being a privileged slave in a country that in the past colonised many poor countries and now can have a so-called high standard of living. And I feel I can promote the ideas of communism, no matter if I am living a life far from what I believe.
I am an influencer, they say, and all I do is to attract people around me so they can boost my ego and thus feel better.
I am a good mother, they say, and every time I can’t cope with my nerves, because I decided to live with a man I don’t like (well, I might hate all men actually but I feel I can’t express it because who am I to say such things and disrupt people?), I extinguish the fire inside me by beating my children , swearing, in general make them feel guilty for being there and reminding me of their father.
I am a good father, they say, and every time my woman doesn’t want to follow my sex drive I get furious. And if I decide to keep this for years then I want to rape my children, and if I don’t have, I will go to church and find some. Or maybe I can rape another woman. Who cares, that is what women are for, right? I could have sex with another man, but no, this is sick and I am a normal person.
I am a religious person, they say, and I like it. Every time I feel awful I pray and thus feel I am blessed and everything will get better. Of course the next day none of this remains and I can even commit a crime. At least, the altar in my house will be there and I would be able to ask forgiveness from my God. Also, when my husband or wife misbehaves I also pray this will stop and for an instance feel better hoping for a better future. Sometimes I do pray for my redemption. So that the end of my life comes fast and stop this suffering.
I am a professional, they say, and I wake up every day at 8am. I hate this but I still find rational doing it for 20 years. My body is awful and sore, it could be from sitting 8 hours per day on a chair, but at least I have my insurance and can go to hospital to get checked. That is why I am paying them for after all, right? But that doesn’t take away from me the 100kg of my body. I’ve tried many times to change my diet, but nought. And that boss, that awful woman who can’t stand  going back to her home. She doesn’t want to face her husband and son. I can hear her arguing all day long with her son. Poor ill-fated guy. What have you done to have such a mother, that the only relationship she ever formed with you was giving you pocket money to go out and don’t fuck with her nerves? Because she also hates waking up and going to the office, and every now and then she is inventing reasons for not coming in the office. At least she doesn’t argue with her husband. They just don’t speak and it’s better, I assume, for them. He is also a successful person they say. It makes sense. He must wear a tie and a suit right now. That is how successful people look like.

Labeling / Etiquetado / Ετικετοποίηση / Etiquetagem

Infant, kid, boy, guy, straight, bi, gay and finally human.

Bebé, niño, muchacho, hombre, hetero, bi, homosexual y finalmente humano.

Βρεφος, παιδι, αγορι, αντρας, στρειτ, μπάι , γκέι, και εν τέλει άνθρωπος.

Lactente, criança, menino, homem, hetero, bi, gay, e, finalmente, humano.


He once started to find the world, but it was so difficult to find it.

He knew neither where to go, nor where to look for it.
He was trembling every single step he used to take, no matter how full of courage he was.

Roads full of thorns ahead and he stayed back, showing cowardliness.

But the horse inside him was denying to stay back. It was there, waiting for the time when the thorns become buds to gallop cheerfully.

It was then when he realised that the weight of birth was unbearable for a human to keep walking.

That either you keep walking or stop.

It was something else who told him to keep going and forget the voices of the carnivorous society.

Death – Father and mother of god

Today I have come to a conclusion after reading about Osho and his life.
Osho was a great philosopher and a highly spiritual person who was judged in his homeland, as it usually happens with people bringing free ideas and disrupt local societies and of course go against traditions and religions.
However, Osho’s acceptance by the Indian society has been great after his death. And that made me realise something I will explain below.
One might ask, why have I come to this conclusion after reading about Osho’s life. I don’t know. It could have happened on any other day and while reading the biography of any spirituous person whose work has been acknowledged post-portem.
Indian society is a very strict society in regards to traditions and beliefs. And exactly this intolerance for anything progressive or new is what had caused many women rapes, murders on the name of family pride and also the death of famous people who decided to go against the public opinion.

I personally believe that some people, through challenges they’ve been through their lives, either self assigned or by life itself, they reach a level, a spiritual level that is what freedom is all about. After fighting with people, ideas, beliefs, dogmas, political systems etc you can really get to see how trivial importance all these have when you reach the level of consciousness and realise what life is all about. Most people, when they reach this state, they try, out of excitement for their discovery, to pass this knowledge. I am still not sure and I might never be whether this process is a conscious or not process but for sure there is a reason why they feel it is essential to pass and share this knowledge which is a result of the combination of ones intellect and their life experience.

During the process of sharing this knowledge some will follow without a second thought, enchanted by the lyrical speech of the person.
Others might try to criticise and even try to hush them up, because their speech goes against their own benefits. Even these people, however, are aware of the importance of their speech. They silently recognise the greatness of their soul. But no matter what, in certain conditions they might even try to kill that person, sometimes for no personal reason, maybe because someone bribed them to do so. In other cases they will haunt them down and even expel them from their homeland for their progressive ideas. But out of a sudden, post-portem, they will be the biggest supporters of their speech. We have great examples in religions. People that lived at some point in the past and were heavily criticised when alive and later after-life were used as an idol to worship.

It seems to me that people cannot forgive the fact that one of them reached that point. That a human-like being reached a level that the average human mind couldn’t perceive. As long as the highly spirituous person is alive, people will never accept that they decided to not follow the path he or she took, the path of struggle. And that’s why most of these spiritual persons have a lonely life, with a very small circle of persons. Because people usually tend to see the surface which is the result, and not the struggle the person has gone through to get there.

Mystery of life

Life is a big mystery and on the same time we pretend we know and understand a lot about it. Ask a scientist and they will tell you they know the truth when they have just got nuggets of the bigger truth that we will most likely never manage to see.

Socrates used to say that he knew only one thing, that he knew nothing!
And what a big truth that is.

We are born by accident which is not an accident. But as my parents use to remind me every now and then, my case was somehow an accident as my father was using a condom but the condom broke without being able to notice and that one out of millions spermatozoa that was later transformed into what I am right now managed to reach and penetrate my mother’s ovum resting in her uterus. Isn’t it this moment pure magic?
Is this really by accident or not? Are we born out of coincidence or there is something crazy enough for the average mind to perceive that manages all this? Which are the powers and the criteria that make the stronger spermatozoon reach the ovum? What is this power and where does it take its power and will this little creature to run towards it?

What is given, is that nowadays humans have managed to manipulate nature in a way. They manage to find the way to “inject” the spermatozoon into the ovum.
They can even select which one they want to insert. But from that time on very little can be done, although we have managed to monitor the whole process. But we still know very little about it.

And then we came to light and start to see the world here. We lived for many years being non conscious. And we still are not at all. However for sure we know a lot more than the humans that were living many centuries ago. Life evolves, as well as all the species. You can observe this, from the bacteria that change constantly their genes in order to survive to our own human species that is constantly changing its habits and believes.
It seems to me that it is a constant fight among all kind of lives in this world for survival. We try to do the best to stay here but little we know again about our future.
For example, little we know for the extinction of prehistoric mammals like Mammoths. We just assume, believing in theories.
In general, the human kind has been let’s say slave of its own theories. Somehow we are condemned to live like that.
Another assumption is that animals have no consciousness of their existence. But how can we be sure about it, since we don’t have the ability to be in their position?
And I am also sure that some of us have met people living with a bigger lack of consciousness than a dog or cat.
I also presumed once that I was able to see a dog being happy for being and acting as a dog and a cat being happy for being and acting as a cat and not giving a shit what a human thinks of them. Of course if I would ever be able to ask them if they are happy for behaving as a dog or cat, their reply would be something like this: “What the fuck human! What are you talking about? What does behaving like a cat or dog means?”

And the other day I remember of me wondering whether a human is happy for behaving as a human. But then I asked myself again what a human being is? And I wasn’t able to give an answer. We are a mammal for sure. But mammal is a word invented by humans. And ok, we share so many things with them. But then if you see each mammal separately they are all so different. They have even developed skills and managed to change their genes to adapt in an environment. And this is also magic. How a species is able to change its own genes? How could it be this possible? What is the power again that makes a living organism mutate? How is this mechanism enabled? Could we ever know about it? Of course there are many theories about it but still it seems crazy to me although it is not crazy. It looks like the drop of water that falls and take the shape of the container or gets absorbed by the soil or even evaporates. We are atoms who constantly change and either take shape or degrade. So, who decides what is the shape we take after all ? Which factors play important role in this interaction of atoms and material in general so that something forms shape? And why me right now am I thinking about this?
What made me write all this? I don’t even know. What I just remember is that I felt strange and the best thing I had to do is to start writing something. So maybe all this is an attempt to just feel better. If I feel better right now? Maybe.
Still, I know nothing I believe. But I will always search to learn more as long as this strange power keeps my shape as it is and makes me able to write down thoughts.
One thing I think I know. That today I am not the same person as the one yesterday. Everything changes. Nothing remains stagnant or permanent. Nothing! I think so at least.

Society of fear

The biggest fear of a state is to not have your data stored.
Your consent is their existence.

They told you, obey, and we’ll provide food.

But then they took it away because you were a bad boy or girl.

And you then were afraid you need them. Because you needed food.

They told you, obey, and we will provide housing.

And then they took it away because you were a non productive human being.

They told you, obey, and we will provide money.

And then they reduced the power of the money they gave you. And you were afraid again and you needed to work more and more to pay for the food and the house.

They told you, obey, and you handed over your freedom out of fear,
the freedom you never appreciated, because you were most likely not born free.
Because freedom is won and not donated.